Band of the Week

I am a bit behind in forgetting the band of the week but it is officially back.

This weeks band of the week is WITHIN TEMPTATION! I have been quite addicted to them for years and they are finally back after a break with a new live cd release and a new single. For those who do not know the band please check them out they are a dutch symphonic metal band with the most amazing front woman in music...Sharon den Adel.






Also here is their new video for "Utopia" featuring Chris Jones

Band/Musician of the Week

Ok I am going to post my favorite Band/Musician for the week from now on.  I will do this every Wednesday.  This week goes to Inkubus Sukkubus.  They're an amazing pagan rock/metal band from England.  Do check them out and here's a video clip with some of their music.



A fan video for their song "Vlad" set to the movie The Dark Prince: The True Story of Dracula

Stress Happens (part 1) "To the Bitch that killed my dad"

Being stressed, story of my life right?  I'm always stressing about something.  This time I'm stressing about everything.  To explain it all is going to take a series of blog posts...so bear with me.

First of all there is my parents.  I lost my father unexpectedly last November and it's been stress city ever since.  I don't have peace with his death.  I can't seem to make peace with it.  This is mainly because the woman who as good as killed him is suing me for his estate stating she was his wife and deserves it.  Ok hold it there bitch my father was never married to you.  Add to that you drugged up whore you as good as killed him by choosing to smoke crack instead of letting him get all the medical help he needed.  If there is anything I'd love to do to you it's choke your fat ass.  I hate you.  I just want to say that to you.  I hate you! You took my daddy away from me and never gave him back.  You would never let him get clean from drugs.  You wouldn't go the fuck away.  If not for you, you no good mother fucking bitch my parents would have stayed together but you just had to have him.  Well my Daddy was a good man and he always deserved better than you.  I hope you rot in hell you deserve nothing less.  You deserve to be hanged, drawn, and quartered for the things you did.  You never cared about anyone but yourself.  You only want the money so you can buy you more drugs.  Don't you get enough whoring yourself out?  Why don't you overdose?  Better yet go take a nice jump off a bridge and don't come to the top.  I have never had such harsh feelings toward another human being but you are the exception.  You deserve to burn...to die the most gruesome and horrible death anyone could wish on another person.  All you ever were to my dad was the biggest mistake he ever made.  So take your fat ass and your lies and go to hell. I hate you and I want you to get out of my life and leave my family alone.  When I say leave us alone I mean leave us alone.  I don't mean go and beg my grandparents for money when they barely have the money to feed themselves.  I mean leave us all alone.  Go away and pretend we all disappeared from this world.  All you are is trouble and all you do is lie.  You lied to me, you lied to my dad, you lie to everyone.  Go away you don't deserve anything my dad left behind.  You don't even deserve my kindness.  From the moment I met you, you were trouble.  That's all you have ever been.  You used to lock me out of the house in the cold without a coat so you could do your drugs in luxury.  You beat my father while he was in a wheel chair and could not defend himself.  You drained him and my grandparents of what little money they had.  You put a wedge in between me and my dad so deep we hardly spoke from the time I met you.  Go ruin someone  else's life.  You're not welcome here.  Take my advice bitch and go the fuck away.  You are not wanted here.

New Artwork!

Showing off some new graphic artwork I've done

SHARON!!!!


Amy Lee


Ville Valo

UTOPIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Utopia has leaked.  Enjoy a listen.  It's pure WT love for me.



and a new set

Sharon Icons

Here are some icons of Sharon Den Adel the lead singer of Within Temptation.

1	2	3
4	5	6
7	8	9
10	11	12
13	14	15

On the Inside

I would like to say that I'm doing better now.  I'm just me all the time anyway.  I've noticed how much I have changed over the past year, everything that has changed me.  I've finally stopped outrunning myself.  I'm finally becoming myself.  Everything in my life affects me in someway whether it helps me get better or only makes things worse.  I'm just living my life.  It's all I can do but live my life today and not live for something that doesn't exist yet.

The past week hasn't been easy.  Some people have judged and certainly misjudged me.  I wish people would get to know me before they make assumptions that I'm some bitchy, manipulative lunatic.  Some things that happened were immaturity.  I won't say I'm an adult 100% of the time because I'm not but it was so hard to walk away from what was said and not tell this person to shut up because they don't know me.  Yes I'm not perfect, no one is.  I mean I've nearly lost a friend this week because I got upset and didn't think before I speak.  And she's such a good friend and it makes me happy to have thought things out because she's been there for me.  I'm glad I could think and realize yeah I was stupid.  If I tried I could probably rant about everything that has pissed me off lately.  Some things have more grated at my nerves than pissed me off but still I got mad.  I want to rant...hell I want to scream.  I can't stand being treated that way.  I am so sick of being picked on by people who do not know me it really isn't funny.  I have normally been the target for that treatment since I was 13 and now  I won't stand for it.  Now if you like me that's great and if you don't it's your loss.  I'm not wasting my time on people who are just going to treat me like shit.  If you don't like me then I just don't care anymore.  I care more about being true to who I am.  I'm a bit complicated but I am first and always myself.

This song by Daughtry has really given me some insight into myself it's called "On the Inside"

Your life is like a crack in the mirror
7 years of bad luck it ain't getting better now
Not till all is said and done
Reflection in the window is the same old face
Background small town everywhere you look around
Tell me what you're runnin from

Flip a coin and let it land in your hand
Heads you gonna stay but its tails


So you can move to another town
Hide where you're sure you wont be found
But its still just you on the inside
You can pretend it'll be alright
Said it to yourself but you know its just a lie
Cause its still just you on the inside

Still you on the inside...


Nothin faster than the speed of your leavin
A hundred miles an hour and there ain't no slowin down
But you can't outrun yourself
Hey you can say you fit in like a joker in the deck
But now you're skipping like a broken record goin round
you're the last to ask for help


You flip a coin and let it land in your hand
Heads you gonna stay but its tails


So you can move to another town
Hide where you're sure you wont be found
But its still just you on the inside
You can't pretend it'll be alright
Said it to yourself but you know its just a lie
Cause its still just you on the inside

Still you on the inside


Its never really been a question of how far
And at the end of every destination there you are


You can move to another town
Hide where you're sure you won't be found
But its still just you on the inside
You can pretend it will be alright
No matter how you sell it
When you tell it its a lie
Cause its still just you on the inside
Still you on the inside (You can go
and change and to me you'll always be the same)
Still you on the inside (You can try
and run and know you'll always be
the same inside)
Still you on the inside (You can go
and change and to me you'll always be the same)
Still you on the inside (You can try
and run and know you'll always be
the same inside)
Still you on the inside.